The Adventures of Poor Frank II: Fixed Again


The Adventures of Poor Frank II:  Fixed Again

by Ray Adams

Poor Frank was playing a hot game of bridge the other night at his local duplicate club.  His chances of finishing first were excellent there was one substantial obstacle in his path.  This was Poor Frank’s chief rival, Ian Archibald, generally known as “Lucky Archie.”

It all came down to the following exciting hand:

Dealer South Vulnerable none  handc


Poor Frank reached 6♦ on the sequence shown above.  East led the ♣A, then switched to a trump when he saw Poor Frank’s queen fall.  Declarer won in hand and led a spade to the queen.  He ruffed a club high and returned to dummy via the ♠K.  He then ruffed another club high.  Poor Frank led his last diamond to dummy and ran trumps, sluffing two hearts while picking up East’s remaining trumps.  He cashed the ♥K, then led a heart to his high hand of the ♥A and the ace and jack of spades.  The good bidding and nice dummy reversal made it appear that Poor Frank would win that evening’s laurels.  Unfortunately, when Lucky Archie was declarer, he lived up to his name. In a bidding sequence too gruesome to appear in print, Lucky Archie arrived in a 6NT contract when he held the South cards.  West led the ♣J, and East, thinking that Archie held the ♣A and ♣Q for his bid, signaled encouragement with the nine.  Lucky Archie won his singleton queen.  When he later played East for the ♥Q, he came to a total of 13 tricks.  This allowed Archie to beat Frank by one point and finish first that evening. Poor Frank was not consoled by all the local bridge buffs who told him he deserved to finish first.  Instead he wondered just exactly what he had to do to beat his rival.

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4 Responses to The Adventures of Poor Frank II: Fixed Again

  1. Henry says:

    “Instead he wondered just exactly what he had to do to beat his rival.”

    He obviously needs to kill his rival.


    • poorfrank says:

      Hi Henry, Your solution at first glance seems somewhat drastic, but after a bit of analysis, this may not really be the case. As you know, the ACBL’s policy of Zero Tolerance protects us from the rudeness of fellow bridge players, and I feel homicide would definitely be considered rude. However, if this were a first offense, Poor Frank might get off with only a half-board penalty. Unfortunately for Frank, he would still have to deal with the judicial system. But I feel that if Poor Frank were to be judged by a jury of his peers, that is, above average bridge players, then he might get off when it was ruled that this act was justifiable homicide. But Poor Frank is a gentle soul who would never murder his rival. His aim in bridge is to do his best and if that isn’t enough, then he relies on the age-old technique of almost all bridge players, that is, to complain about his bad luck. Thank you for your comment and I hope you do well at the table. Best wishes, Ray Adams

      Liked by 1 person

      • thebighenry says:


        Though I am sure you realize my remark was facetious, I am also sure we have all met some players who deserve nothing less.


        Best, Henry


      • poorfrank says:

        Well, as I said, homicide should be a last resort, but I think that unless the ACBL approves more than a one board penalty for it in their Zero Tolerance guidelines, we might see more of it at the table. Although, bridge players being who they are, maybe the ACBL is right in its infinite wisdom and a one board penalty is all it takes to prevent murder at the table. Keep on trucking at the table, Ray

        Liked by 1 person

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