The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXVIII: Poor Frank’s Brilliant Squeeze

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXVIII: Poor Frank’s Brilliant Squeeze

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Poor Frank was sharp just the other night at the local duplicate club.

Poor Frank and his partner bid up to a shaky five club contract and West led the eight of clubs, won by declarer in hand. Poor Frank could see four possible losers: a spade, a diamond, and two hearts. He knew he had to play this hand very carefully or he would go down.

At trick two, he led a spade. West rose with the ace and one of Poor Frank’s losers disappeared. West was reluctant to break another suit for declarer and exited with a spade. Poor Frank ruffed this and crossed to a high trump. When Poor Frank led a small heart, East had no choice but to duck or give declarer his contract. Thus, South’s king won this trick. Poor Frank now drew the last trump with dummy’s last high honor. He then cashed the king of spades, tossing his penultimate heart, and ruffed dummy’s last spade as both opponents followed.

Poor Frank now cashed his last trump, tossing the nine of diamonds from the dummy. East had no good discard. If East threw a heart, Poor Frank would duck a heart and establish dummy’s queen as the eleventh trick. Instead, East let go a diamond. Poor Frank now cashed dummy’s king and overtook the ten with his ace. When East’s jack fell on this trick, Poor Frank’s eight of diamonds took the eleventh trick. Poor Frank had played this hand brilliantly and deserved to win this evening. However, several other players, including Lucky Archie had bid 3NT over their partner’s three club bid and this had led to ten tricks in the form of six clubs, two diamonds, one spade, and one heart. Thus, Poor Frank’s reward for his brilliance was a below-average board and a score that dropped him into third place.

“Well, darling,” Janet said to Frank as they discussed that evening’s boards later. “I admire your beautiful play of the hand, but never forget that in matchpoints, it’s the higher score that counts. So never bypass 3NT if that is an option.”

“Yes, sweetheart,” Poor Frank said. “I let my singleton spade talk me out of the 3NT contract and I shouldn’t have.”

“Never forget, darling, that your arch enemy, the Lucky One, won’t let anything – not even a void – keep him out of 3NT.”

“Yes, but if I start bidding like him, what’s the point of even playing?”

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXVI: Beating the Split

                                                                                                                                                                                   

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXVI: Beating the Split

     By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

fPoor Frank overcame a bad split against Lucky Archie the other night at the local duplicate club to bring home a very tough contract.

 

 

In the auction, North’s bid of 2♦ was Michael’s, showing the majors. When North bid 5♣, Lucky Archie slammed the double card down on the table in what was probably an unethical manner. Red Dyeman, his partner paused for a long time, clearly not wanting to defend five clubs doubled with his unusual 7-5 hand, but he finally passed, trusting Lucky Archie to know what he was doing.

Red led the queen of hearts to the king and ace. Poor Frank tried the king of clubs, revealing the bad split. Lucky Archie flashed him an evil grin and said, “Down, down, down, Frankie baby.   Down, down, down.”

Poor Frank next tried the king of diamonds, won by Archie’s ace. The Lucky One shot back a heart, ruffed by declarer. Poor Frank now crossed to the jack of diamonds, noticing Red was out, then led the eight of diamonds to his nine. He now cashed the queen of diamonds, tossing a spade from dummy. Next came the thirteenth diamond as dummy’s penultimate spade was discarded. Lucky Archie ruffed this and put the ten of spades on the table. Poor Frank won his ace, ruffed a spade in dummy with the jack. He then led a trump to his nine and claimed the last two tricks on a high cross ruff.

Red was not happy with this result, saying, “If you’re going to double them, Archie, make sure you set them. Five hearts is only down one.”

Poor Frank was happy to report this result to Janet later that evening when they discussed the boards.

“It was so nice to make Archie eat his words,” he said. “Down, down, down, indeed.”

“Well, I must say, darling, that was one of your better played hands. You used the distribution to your advantage and made Archie pay. Did you say, ‘Up, up, up’ after the hand was over?”

“No, I felt sorry for Archie after the way Red criticized him. I said, ‘Don’t let it get you down, Archie.’”

“Oh, darling, I think you’re as great a person as you are a player.”

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXV: The Play is the Thing

 

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXV: The Play is the Thing

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Poor Frank and Lucky Archie were neck and neck just the other night at the local duplicate club. Neither one found the best contract on the last hand of the evening. Nevertheless, whoever scored higher on it would waltz into first place.

The top auction occurred when Poor Frank held the South cards. Surely the pair should have arrived in 4♠ or even 3NT, both better contracts than 5♣, but Poor Frank bid his hand as though he had seven clubs and North assumed that to be the case when he put Frank in game in that suit. The only good thing that can be said about Poor Frank’s contract is that it appeared – at least on the surface – to be a better spot than Lucky Archie’s 4♥ effort in a 4-2 fit! But on this evening, the play was the thing.

Poor Frank won the queen of diamonds lead with the ace and led a spade to the jack. He returned to hand with the ace of hearts, cashed the king of hearts, and tried a spade to the queen. He then cashed the ace of spades, tossing a diamond. He threw his last diamond on the queen of hearts. When he led the jack of clubs, East ducked and Poor Frank won his king.

The six of clubs went to the eight and nine. Poor Frank ruffed the diamond return and led a trump.

When trumps split, he claimed eleven tricks. This was an amazing result, but he and Lucky Archie were so close in score, that if the Lucky One made 4♥ , he would win that evening.

Lucky Archie almost fainted when he discovered he was declarer in 4♥. He had mistakenly put the 2♥ card on the table instead of the one for 2♣. His partner had quickly raised him to game and this is why he found himself in such an offbeat contract. His play was similar to Poor Frank’s. He won the opening diamond lead and led a spade to the jack. He came to hand with the ace of hearts, cashed the king of hearts and repeated the spade finesse. He then drew the outstanding trumps with the queen and jack. Then Archie ran the spades to score ten tricks. When he led a club, East rose with the ace and the defenders took the last two tricks with diamonds.

Later that evening, when Poor Frank discussed the hands with Janet, he bemoaned his fate once again. On this particular evening, she was having none of it.

“You were lucky tonight, darling,” she said. “When you lead the jack of clubs, all East has to do is play the nine. Now West can win the eight at trick ten and exit with a heart. The defense will now score the ace and queen of clubs separately to set you.”

Poor Frank looked at his lovely friend with respect. Had she become a better bridge player than he was? If so, maybe she could help him devise a strategy to defeat his lucky rival.

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXIV: Fear of Sleeping, Part II

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXIV: Fear of Sleeping, Part II

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

The night following Poor Frank’s traumatic dream in which Lucky Archie had squeezed him, Poor Frank drifted into dreamland once again.

Poor Frank arrived in six hearts via the same method as had Lucky Archie the previous evening. The dream Poor Frank recognized the bidding and the hand, especially after the opening lead of the king of diamonds was made and the dummy laid down. Except, there seemed to be something wrong. But what was it? Poor Frank studied his hand carefully and then he saw it. The ten of diamonds was gone. What could that mean? It looked ominous, but the dream Poor Frank went ahead and played the hand the best he could.

He won the ace of diamonds, drew one round of trumps with the ace, then played the ace of clubs. He tossed one of dummy’s diamonds and ruffed a club. When no king of clubs fell, he ran the trumps, just as the Lucky One had in the previous dream.

The dream West was put under pressure the way Poor Frank had been the night before. West feared an endplay, and in a desperate attempt to prevent this, threw all his high diamonds, coming down to the king and jack of spades, plus the four of diamonds. The dummy was down to the diamond six and the ace and five of spades. Lucky Archie had one spade, the king of clubs, and the nine of diamonds. Poor Frank held the eight of diamonds and the queen and ten of spades.

Poor Frank tried for the endplay, leading a diamond from dummy. But Lucky Archie was able to win the nine of diamonds and send a spade through Poor Frank, putting the contract one down. Once again Poor Frank woke up barely able to stifle a scream.

“As soon as I saw the nine of diamonds come out of Archie’s hand, I knew it was a dream,” he said to Janet the next day. “Archie would never have been clever enough to save that card.”

“Frank,darling,” she said, “have you ever thought that maybe your fear is that of sleeping alone?”

“Hmm,” he said, “you could be right. Then do you think there might be a cure?”

She smiled and him and squeezed his hand.

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXIII: Fear of Sleeping, Part I

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXIII: Fear of Sleeping, Part I

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Just the other night after a tough game at the local duplicate club, Poor Frank had an even tougher game in his dreams.

 

North transferred Lucky Archie to hearts after the Lucky One opened 1NT, and North then took a shot at six hearts. The contract appears to have two losers in the absence of a club lead, not a likely choice when the opening leader holds a KQJ sequence. Indeed, Poor Frank led the king of diamonds, taken by dummy’s ace. Lucky Archie then drew trumps with the ace, cashed the ace of clubs, tossing a diamond from dummy, and ruffed a club, hoping to see a doubleton king. This did not materialize, and Archie got bored with ruffing and ran his trumps.

The run of the hearts put severe pressure on Poor Frank, who had the key cards in spades and diamonds. When the last heart was played, he had come down to the queen of diamonds and the king and jack of spades. Dummy had the ace and five of spades and the six of diamonds. East was holding onto clubs, while Lucky Archie had the ten of diamonds and the queen and ten of spades.

The dream Lucky Archie looked puzzled and seemed unable to decide what to do. Finally he said,

“What the hell, partner, lead a diamond.”   This went to the ten and Poor Frank’s queen. But now, Poor Frank had to lead away from his king of spades and the contract had been made.

Lucky Archie was ecstatic and jumped up and down. “Thanks, Frankie baby,” he said, “I couldn’t have made it without you.”

Poor Frank woke up then, shaking and gasping in terror.

The next day, he told Janet about his dream. “At the very end, I knew it was a dream because Lucky Archie could never have pulled off such a neat squeeze. Nonetheless, it scared the hell out of me.”

“There, there,” Janet said, patting Poor Frank’s hand. “It’s over now and it never happened.”

“But it seemed so real. And now I think I’m developing a phobia. I’m afraid to go to sleep. I’m terrified Lucky Archie will do terrible things to me in my dreams.”

“But seriously, darling, surely there’s nothing to fear. Nothing he does in your dreams could be any worse than what happens every week at the club.”

“Perhaps you’re right, but I don’t know,” Poor Frank said in a gloomy voice.

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXII: Wrong is Right

 

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXII: Wrong is Right

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Can wrong be right? When Lucky Archie is in the equation, anything is possible.

 

Red Dyeman and Lucky Archie produced a nice bidding sequence to arrive at six diamonds – only they didn’t! At the last moment, when Lucky Archie thought he had put the six diamond bid on the table, he had actually put the six heart card down. Red assumed Archie knew what he was doing – after all Red had four good hearts of his own – and he passed. So six hearts became the final contract and Poor Frank led the king of spades.

Lucky Archie immediately called the director and explained that his left hand opponent had led out of turn. It took the other three players a good five minutes to convince Lucky Archie that he was playing six hearts and Red was the dummy. When this sank in, Lucky Archie immediately fainted. Luckily, the director had smelling salts for just such an occasion, and the Lucky One was soon revived.

The king of spades went to Archie’s ace and he immediately ruffed a small spade in dummy. Next came a heart to the ace and a heart back to the jack, finessing the queen. This held and the king of hearts was cashed, leaving Poor Frank’s queen as the only trump remaining. Lucky Archie now ran the diamonds, but Poor Frank ruffed in on the third round. Poor Frank had only clubs left and he exited with a sneaky nine of clubs. Lucky Archie had no choice but to let this run around to his queen. He now led a club to the good dummy and claimed. Of course, this was a top result for him and let him slide past Poor Frank into first place that evening.

Later, when Poor Frank was discussing the evening’s hands with Janet, he said, “How can wrong be right? And how come when it is right, I’m always the victim?”

“What’s interesting about this hand, darling, is that it’s cold for seven diamonds. All you have to do is take the heart finesse, ruff a heart and lead the queen of clubs to smother the singleton jack in the East hand. Now if someone had bid and made seven diamonds, would they have been wrong?”

“No, dearest, they would have been lucky overbidders. But what Archie did was just plain wrong. It goes against all the teachings of the great bridge gurus.”

“Well, darling, would it be wrong for you to come right over here?”

And that put Poor Frank back in a good mood.

 

 

 

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXI: Poor Frank’s Great Save

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXXI: Poor Frank’s Great Save

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

 

Poor Frank needed one good board to beat Lucky Archie just the other night at the local duplicate club. He saw an opportunity on the evening’s last hand.

When Lucky Archie’s four spade bid came around to Poor Frank, he decided he had no defense to speak of against this contract and he chose to sacrifice at five clubs. North now decided he had extra values and took the push to five spades, which Jack Leeder, West and Poor Frank’s partner, doubled.

The opening lead was the two of clubs to the seven, jack, and the Lucky One’s ace. Lucky Archie wasted no time ruffing a club, then playing three rounds of hearts to toss his two losing diamonds. He then ruffed a diamond, ruffed his last club in dummy, and claimed, conceding two tricks to the ace and queen of spades. This was worth 850 to Archie and allowed him to surge past Poor Frank and win that evening’s game.

Later, when Poor Frank was discussing the evening’s events with Janet, he said, “I asked Jack what he would have led against four spades. He said he would have tried a diamond, since he didn’t need much from me to make it a good lead. That means we would have taken two diamond tricks and two spades to set four spades. Can you believe that?”

“Bridge is such an amazing game,” Janet said. “You could have set four spades, but you couldn’t set five spades doubled. However, I think your sacrifice was ill judged, darling. It looks like you would have gone down at least 800. And that’s not a very good sacrifice.”

“You’re right, sweetheart. It’s just that I want to beat that lucky duck so much. I guess I just have to learn that sacrificing against an idiot makes one an imbecile or even worse.”

“Well, I would have never said that, darling,” Janet said. “But learning from your mistakes is always a good idea.”

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXX: A Sweet Overtrick

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXX: A Sweet Overtrick

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Poor Frank and Lucky Archie were locked in a virtual draw for first place just the other night at the local duplicate club. The final board would seal their fate:

 

Poor Frank took a shot at four hearts when it was his turn to bid and that ended the auction. Lucky Archie led the queen of spades, which was allowed to hold. The jack of spades continuation was also allowed to hold. Even Archie could see that one more spade would fell East’s presumed ace. He decided to switch to a diamond. Most players would lead low from three to a ten, accepting the fact that the ten was usually considered to be an honor. But Archie made the bold and fateful lead of the ten itself. This went to the four, nine, and Poor Frank’s queen.

Poor Frank now drew trumps in four rounds and continued the suit. When he led the last trump, Lucky Archie’s last four cards were insignificant: two clubs to the jack, and two small diamonds as he had pitched both his remaining spades. Dummy had three clubs to the ace and king plus the king of diamonds. East had held onto three clubs to the queen, plus the ace of diamonds, having tossed the ace of spades after declarer had discarded dummy’s king of spades.

The Lucky One threw a small diamond on this last trump and Poor Frank called for dummy’s king of diamonds. East could see he had to hold onto three clubs to the queen, so he let go of the ace of diamonds. Poor Frank now produced the seven of diamonds and the ace and king of clubs allowed him to make a sweet overtrick. Since everyone else had only made ten tricks on this hand, the result was enough to allow Poor Frank to beat Lucky Archie for that evening’s laurels.

“Archie, you dolt,” East yelled after the hand was over. “Leading that ten cost you first place. Now Poor Frank was able to squeeze me.”

“I would have won if you’d simply taken your ace,” Archie said. “And you threw away that ace later. What kind of player are you, then?”

“I don’t know how anyone can play with someone as dense as Archie,” Poor Frank said to Janet later that evening, “and yet players line up to partner him.”

“Well, it’s their misfortune and none of your own, darling,” Janet said. “But I feel sorry for tens. No one know whether to treat them as an honor or a spotcard. I think Archie thought he was leading top of nothing.”

“Tens are valuable cards if you use them correctly,” Poor Frank said. “But in the hands of idiots like Archie, they lose most of their importance.”

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXIX: The L of It

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXIX: The L of It

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Just the other night at the local duplicate club, Poor Frank and Lucky Archie both had to make a decision at trick one of a tough contract that would determine that evening’s winner.

When Poor Frank declared 3NT, West led the ten of diamonds, covered by the jack and won by East’s king. East wasted no time cashing the ace of diamonds and returning a diamond, which established two additional diamond tricks for West. When Poor Frank tried to come to hand with a spade, West won the ace and cashed the diamonds for a quick down one.

Lucky Archie also declared the same contract and received the same lead. However, when Archie called for a card from dummy, he began to cough violently and no one was sure which card he had indicated. The director was called and tried to make sense of the situation.

Archie’s right hand opponent, a Miss Sansouci, said, “I heard elle, as in French for she.”

His left hand opponent, a Mr. Sanchez, said, “I heard el as in el toro.”

His partner said, “I heard L as in what the L.”

The director, known throughout the local bridge community as possessing the wisdom of King Solomon, then made his ruling. “Well, queen has no L sound in it. Neither does jack, six, or three. I believe our Archibald called ‘small’.” And so, dummy’s three was played.

Thus, West’s ten won the trick and East won the next two diamond tricks, but then had no diamond to return. So, when West took the ace of spades, diamonds had not been established. This fact, combined with the king of hearts being in the slot, allowed Lucky Archie to quickly line up nine tricks in front of him. The result of Archie making 3NT and Poor Frank going down was enough to propel the Lucky One into that evening’s winner circle.

Poor Frank could hardly believe it. Had Archie really called for a small card from dummy? Had he been that astute to see that such a play would block the suit?

“I sincerely doubt that he knew what he was doing,” Poor Frank said to Janet later that evening.

“I’m sure you’re right, darling,”she said. “I guess we’ll just call it the time Archie beat the L out of you.”

They both laughed at that, but not for very long.

 

 

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXVIII: Ducky Archie

The Adventures of Poor Frank, Part CLXXVIII: Ducky Archie

By Ray Adams

frankandarchie@yahoo.com

Lucky Archie earned himself a new nickname just the other night at the local duplicate club.

 

Poor Frank arrived in six diamonds on the auction given above and West led the ten of spades, taken in dummy by the ace. Poor Frank must have been horrified as he studied the dummy. He had a sure loser in the ace of hearts and there was no way he could bring in clubs without losing at least one trick. It was not a very good slam to say the least. But then, his right hand opponent was Lucky Archie and perhaps he could take advantage of that fact.

As it turns out, Lucky Archie had been playing a great deal with Red Dyeman as of late. Red was more or less happy with the results this pair kept getting – they usually beat Poor Frank by a point or two for first place – but was not satisfied with the Lucky One’s defense. “You need to remember, second hand low, Archie,” was Red’s favorite admonishment to his partner. Lucky Archie did have a tendency to play honor cards on nothing in the second seat. Usually, Archie paid no attention to Red’s advice, but he had recently lost to Poor Frank simply because he had had banged down an ace in second position. Thus, Archie was still smarting from Red’s harsh words.

Poor Frank tried a ruse at trick two, knowing what had passed between Red and Archie. He led a small heart from dummy. The Lucky One ducked, playing second hand low and not thinking of the entire hand. Had he done so, he would have realized the ace of hearts and his sure club trick would have set the hand.   Poor Frank played the queen. When this held, Poor Frank wasted no time cashing the king of spades to sluff dummy’s king of hearts. He now drew trumps and advanced the jack of clubs. The Lucky One covered with the queen and Poor Frank was soon chalking up plus 1370 for a top board and a good enough result to propel him into that evening’s top spot.

“Can you believe he actually ducked?” Poor Frank said to Janet later as he showed her the crucial hand.

“It’s beyond belief, darling. How can anyone make a play like that and call themselves a good bridge player?”

“Well, I’m telling everyone I can about it,” Poor Frank said. “Maybe they’ll change their view of him. Finally!”

“Well, we can only hope so,” Janet said. “Perhaps, they’ll start calling him Ducky Archie. Now that would be a nickname we could live with.”